words exchanged
to cause an end
i remember them now in visions
as i t seems that i have never been awake
and so i'm
sleeping through days
as i try to defend
theese feelings that surface
through stupid decisions

so fearful
and doubting

so hard to feel
so close to real

passing thoughts
habiting their way in
of the times i never followed through
after all it was for you
i tend to lose
my way, before i begin
this dizzying road that won't lead me away from you

so fearful
and doubting
so fearful
and doubting

so hard to feel
like anythings worth the effort
so close to real
all this time believing i was paranoid

all this time believing i was paranoid
all this time believing i was paranoid
you don't notice
i was waiting
fearful, doubting
fearful, doubting

lost for words
to mean this well
i was living through your conditions
for so long it's hard to tell if i'm just numb
silent and calm but i'm screaming
through this hell
of feelings, that surface, through stupid decisions